You Ass Part II
(Postal Service - Clark Gable)

...I want life in every word, to the extent that it's absurd...

...

Upon further deliberation in my car ride home from rollerhockey...

It's not an oxymoron. In fact it makes perfect sense. When you feel like ass, that's when you're most like to be close to all the shit (see previous blog). When you're in bad spirits or when you're not feeling well, that's when you notice how happy everyone is and how there are sooo many cool parties happening around you. It's not an oxymoron, it's an irony!! It's Murphy's Law!!
...

Two random but blunt things...

1) People who know me, know that I'm not the most optimistic person in the world. In fact, I have been called pensive...and even...pessimistic...gasp. It's a role I'm comfortable with. It's a role I do well. The minute I'm the optimistic one, there's something wrong. I've been the optimistic one; it doesn't work that way. Things go wrong, people get hurt, old ladies slip on ice. I neither have the strength or the inclination. I'm content just being realistic.

2) I wish nothing but happiness for you. Why? -- Because you thrive on drama. You live for tragedies. Self-loathing is addictive I once said. You're actually happiest when you're sitting there thinking about how the fates are always against you. Well you know what, you're going to wake up happy one day!

(now before anyone jumps on this...it's not about you...stop being assumptuous...it never has been about you...it's always been about me...me, damn it.)